Friday, 16 July 2010

Bits and Bobs.

This week I've been on annual leave and determined to make the most of it.  A really enjoyable week, that isn't finished yet either.  Tomorrow there is the Charivari Carnival on in Folkestone, and Sunday there is a Sand sculputure competition down at the Sunny Sands, and in the afternoon a free fun day at a local school, with bouncy castles, rides etc.

Today has been a little more mundane - although still enjoyable.  I had an opticians appointment this morning for contact lenses.  Naturally I have contrary eyes, which means I have to go back once they've ordered in special lenses for me.  So we had a wee wander around the town centre, ( in which Rye pulled the trolley for me)

I picked up a couple of rag rugs, a cricket bat and ball for Rye, which I thought was wood, and is actually foam so better really - he's pretty good at hitting the ball too!

A set of 3 balls to take with us swimming and a large black duck, (that's it at the back there), plus a few other bits and bobs... and fortitiously, as Rye had earlier requested we paint today rather than go swimming, a wooden bird's house to be painted, for a mere £1.50.  So after playing with the balls and cricket bat for a while, we then cleared off the table enough to do some painting.  Rye had great fun painting the bird house, then painting in a print off of a dog surrounded by flowers and butterflies, and then painting spiders.  Spiders are his latest obession, signalling a shift from eyes and smiley faces he had been doing here on the magna doodle:
And you know, the few hours spent in town today, were lovely.  Often I find it rather stressful because Rye thinks the towncentre is just a huge playground all for him - and I end up nagging, threatening, pleading, (never a good look for a parent), and finally getting fed up and shouty.  However, I've been reading Playful Parenting by Lawrence J Cohen, and have been inspired.  I've whined with Rye until he's giggling, I've pretended to eat his nose, on the bus, when he was unhappy about giving up his seat for a lady with a walking stick, and again reduced him to giggles and sparkly eyes.   And earlier when we stopped at the cafe; Rye had a fruity berry thing and I had an iced caramel latte..and a huge seagull sweeped in and stole Rye's buscuit.  (To be honest he didn't really want it.. until the seagull took it, of course).  So I acted "goofy" and suggested the seagull was really, really hungry.  Rye felt happier and every so often keeps telling me about the seagull that stole his buscuit :-), as it's now an adventure, rather than an upset. 

So far, I've not read anything I didn't really already know, (although I'm only 4 or so chapters into the book) - more I've been reminded that actually investing that little bit of effort and time means Rye is happy because I've joined in him in his play and then is much happier to get on and play when I'm otherwise engaged.. and I get to be otherwise engaged without him constantly asking me to play, or saying "mama?, mama?, mama?" - you know, that questioning voice that really isn't interested in any answer you might give - just wants some attention.... and best of all, we reconnect, and fill up the "attachment cup" as Cohen calls it - so we are both happy and really enjoying each other's company.


Fiona said...

What a great book suggestion - thank you.
I am currently finding DD2 a bit of a challenge, and might benefit from some reminders on how to be more child centric in my dealings with her.
Hmm, off to browse Amazon :-)

Joxy said...

Yeah, so far I'm finding it really helpful - especially with the whinning and throwing himself down on the floor when asked to do something. That was driving me batty.

I do find the book a little jarring because its very american in tone, but otherwise its fine.