Tuesday, 13 January 2009

So endth the dream.

Just a quick post while I'm eating my tea.
I've given up trying to put the little 'un in his own room. It seems last night when he woke I should have just got him up and taken him into my room rather than trying to settle him back down in his own room. He now won't settle at all in there now and wants to be phyiscal contact, his head actually resting on me. He is clearly terrified that I will get up and leave him once he's a sleep, even though I tried explaining that he only has to call out "mum mum" and I'll come immediately.

Rather than push it and keep trying and risk causing more far reaching sleep problems, I've taken him back into my room and after a bf and cuddle he finally dropped off to sleep and clearly feels comfortable and safe in my room because I was able to leave the room without him sitting upright bolt and crying for me.

I do feel rather deflated and a large part of me wants to cry. That one night of having my room back was lovely and to be able to sleep undisturbed, pure bliss. However, the little 'un being happy and secure is more important and I'll try again in a few weeks and see how we do. When he is ready he will sleep in his own room, I just have to be patient.


Stephanie said...

Well.... I won't tell you that ours mostly sleep with us, then. Still. :)

Earthenwitch said...

Well done on trying it, anyway, and as you say, next time might be different. It sounds like he's getting there - I think I read somewhere that the path to a full night's sleep is more like a dance than a straight-line progression, so perhaps this is a tango bit of it..?

arwen_tiw said...

Oh drat! Give it time honey, he'll be ready when he's ready.

And what Earthenwitch said, don't fall into the trap of thinking that children learn only in one direction and that you've failed by responding to him HERE in THIS moment and letting him take the lead.

And this too shall pass (I promise).

Joxy said...

Thanks - feeling more optimistic now, and probably too much too soon as there's been a lot of changes for us in the last month or so.

I thought what I might do, as its the fidgeting that#s annoying me more than anything is prehaps see if he will sleep on his bed in my room?

He did actually go into his room when I took him to bed last night and laid down but he wasn't settling and was clearly waiting to see if I'd leave him. So I just took him into my room, he snuggled down and went to sleep and I was able to get some tea! lol

arwen_tiw said...

Tis worth a try.

Morgan could open doors and never shouted or cried for us, just got out of bed and came looking when she woke up in her room! Much easier on me because I could keep putting her down in her room and just be woken by her helping herself in the early hours. ;)

Earthmummy xx said...

Just found your blog via someone elses :)

You have my full sympathy on the fidgeting thing- T likes to lie across my body while I'm asleep and wriggles constantly, even when he's asleep.

I'm sure you'll get there in the end. If anything, responding to him and allowing him to come back into his safety zone will mean he has more confidence to try again later because he knows mummy wont make him stay there if he doesnt want to.

Hugs, Izzi x